The Smallest Things Matter the Most

So my dear friend Margaret recommended I take the enneagram test. Margaret is one of those friends who you’ve known since childhood. She’s always there and we reconnect with no issue every decade or so.

In short, she’s the best. And taking her advice is a no brainer.

So I took the enneagram test. It spelled out for me what I already knew, I have a sensitive personality. I always worry about not fitting in. And that makes me stand out. I am a type 4: an individualist who cares about authentic deep experiences. And guess what? I think Margaret is the same as me!

But another way to interpret that is we are always looking for meaningful connections. And how friends treat (or mistreat) us hits hard. How coworkers or potential connections treat us hit hard. How our loved ones act in the smallest ways can hit hard.

In short, life is hard!

I am in the process of adding to my career skillset. I am a teacher. A teacher struggling with trauma of the past few years. The trauma of student behavior, the trauma of administrative mismanagement and the trauma of coworkers prioritizing their content areas over mine. Also, the trauma of parents taking out their wrath on me and my class. And it hurts. And today I had a job interview!

They first said, “Let me know when you can do an interview.” Then days later “Thanks for providing your contact info. Due to the high number of applicants, please submit a writing sample for review.” No problem, I’m steps ahead of you, here you go. When they responded with an interview time of 3:30 on a Friday, I took that as a win. Finally Friday came. I planned the day with care. I dressed for success, dried my hair and did my makeup. I spent the morning doing work and activities to help me remain calm. I repeatedly practiced interview questions in my mind. Only to get a last minute email, “I need to reschedule, I have a dental procedure.” My outward response is, “Sure, no problem- hope it’s quick and painless.” My inner response is a mix of relief that I won’t fail at the interview but also sadness. A deep sadness that my time isn’t worth it. I wasted two weeks studying, writing, practicing, hoping. Just to be rescheduled again.

This company is a fintech company that helps preschools and early care programs organize their payments on the cloud. They also offer other services such as attendance, online form creating, texting, etc. They were interviewing teachers for a writer position to promote their company. It was a great fit for me, looking to become a copywriter and needing a break from the classroom.

So as a type 4 personality, an individualist my question is… Do I give this company a chance to reschedule? Or do I choose myself.

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